The concept of the “good enough mother” was introduced by British psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott in the 1950s. According to Winnicott, the “good enough mother” is a mother who provides her child with “just enough” care and attention to facilitate their healthy emotional development. Here are a few key points about the good enough mother:

1. The good enough mother is not perfect:
According to Winnicott, it’s not necessary for a mother to be perfect in order to provide adequate care for her child. Instead, the good enough mother is one who is able to provide “ordinary” care, which includes meeting her child’s basic physical and emotional needs.

2. The good enough mother allows her child to experience frustration:
Winnicott believed that it’s important for children to experience frustration and disappointment as part of their emotional development. The good enough mother allows her child to experience these emotions and helps them learn to cope with them in a healthy way.

3. The good enough mother is attuned to her child’s needs:
Although the good enough mother may not be able to meet all of her child’s needs all the time, she is attuned to her child’s needs and responds appropriately. This helps the child feel seen and understood, which is essential for their emotional development.

4. The good enough mother encourages independence:
As children grow and develop, the good enough mother encourages their independence and helps them learn to navigate the world on their own. This involves allowing the child to take risks and make mistakes, while also providing support and guidance as needed.

5. The good enough mother is resilient:
Parenting is a challenging and often thankless job, but the good enough mother is able to weather the ups and downs of parenthood and remain committed to her child’s well-being. She recognises that she may not be perfect, but she does her best to provide her child with a stable and loving home.